Adversity

Thorns and stings
And those such things
Just make stronger
Our angel wings.
~Emme Woodhull-Bäche

God brings men into deep waters, not to drown them, but to cleanse them.  ~John Aughey

A prayer for you

So much has happened the past month, both in my life and the lives of many. I can’t help but to feel sad and heartbroken for the many things that had happened. From funerals to personal emotions breakdown to sad and shocking news of neighbouring countries as well as people near me.

I am not going to tell you all that happened but let me just tell you a story.

. . .

There was a boy who was active and socially lovable. His life was very much full of happiness and hope. He was bright, smart and have a great sense of humour.

One day, while he was playing upstairs in his house, he accidentally tripped and fell down the stairs. His mother ran to him and he staggered to stand up for a moment, looking shaken and groggy.

The next minute, he closed his eyes and fainted. His face turned pale and he could not wake up.

This boy went into coma the next two weeks. His mother kept a silent vigil next to his bed, praying and hoping him to wake up.

Miraculously, he woke up.

However, the fall has caused damage to his brain nerves and causing him to lose his memory and some sensory motor movements. He had to undergo some brain surgery which was highly risky and dangerous.

When he woke up, he could not recognize his family. Worse still, he could not speak. For the next half year, he spent his days in the hospital, learning everything all over again. His mother, a patient and loving woman, took care of him and encouraging him never to give up.

So, after two years of physio-therapy and lots of love and care, this boy has finally gone back to school. Although he may not be as smart as he used to be, at least, he gets the chance to feel normal again.

His speech has improved so much. His motor skills, despite a difficult time with his right side of the body, has shaped into something which he should be proud of. His movements may look clumsy to some, but he has exert in so much of effort to try his best.

And this boy, has been one of my kid in my classes for a year. I am proud and happy to say that he has taught me so much about life.

. . .

A couple of weeks ago, his mother told me that one of the boys in his school fell down from the staircase of the fourth floor. The boy immediately went into coma.

Till date, from what I know, he is still in coma. I shed my tears immediately when I heard this piece of news.

. . .

“Little boy, eventhough we have never met and I don’t even know how you look like, I just want you to know that you are in my prayers.

Be strong in this time of hardship and especially when you are in darkness.

Be brave, because there are so many people who are here with you.

Be determined, because you will wake up and see the faces of your loved ones.

Be grateful, because no matter how tough the times are, just remember that all are in God’s Master Plan for you, and for everyone.

Be persistent, because there are people who have been through what you are going through now and I can tell you that, he is standing strong just for you.

So, little boy, everyone can’t wait for you to open your eyes again and to give us a smile. There is a whole world awaiting you to grow into. I wish you all the best and may you get better soon.”

All thrown in together

Another month of MIA around the blogosphere and a month of of silent reverie had passed by. I’ve finally got off from my emo-ish state and dug out some mood to write today.

There are numerous stuffs I would like to talk about and post since ages ago but I just couldn’t get to it till today. However, please excuse my mumbo-jombo talk as I’m just gonna pour out thoughts all in random order.

First of all, I’m particularly excited during this election season. I’m finally an official voter. Yeah, I know…I know. I haven’t play my part much as a Malaysian all these years and that’s why it’s high time that I exercise my rights a little. For once, I’m interested to listen to friends’ chatter about political issues and recently, getting a great laugh from the various blogs about issues that we should take heed as voters. I even had dreams about drawing a circle in the XXX Party’s logo instead of marking it with an ‘X’. In my dream, I was like, “OMG! How stupid can I be? I’ve lost my chance to support the party of my choice and now, made an UNDI ROSAK! Dang!” So you see, I’m that excited this time, even to the extent of having dreams about it.

Well, tomorrow’s D-Day so see you at the polling station!

…

Oh, apart from the fervor of the General Election, I had spent the past month making lots of time with my family, especially with my niece and nephew. After our accident during the CNY in February, I’m making more conscious effort in ‘being in the moment’. Appreciating every opportunity with my family is of utmost importance to me and it made me realized that I’ve truly taken many things for granted.

Realizing this is quite easy for me as I always take time for contemplation. However, it is the consistency of applying it that is not so easy. As I recall the moment I saw the truck heading towards our car, I really thought that we’re dead meat this time. I remembered closing my eye and hearing the hubby kept shouting “The truck is coming! The truck is coming!” and my SIL screaming, “What should I do? What should I do?” and the next moment, the crash and our car turned around. When I opened my eyes the next minute and felt no pain, I quickly gave a quick prayer to God, rushed out of the car, hugged my family who were shocked and shaken but unharmed.

I thank the grace of God to allow me and my family go through this scary experience without any physical harm and blessed our car, despite it’s terrible damage, for protecting my family. Every time I think about that accident, I feel TRULY BLESSED.

I’m pretty sure our lives were spared for a reason. A chance for us to be better people, better wife and husband, better brother and sister, better children, better citizen, better friends. We may not be perfect, but we are damn lucky to pass through this accident, humbled and somehow, enlightened. I actually have some pictures of the car but didn’t really feel like posting it here. Anyway, to all my friends, please don’t worry. Everything and everyone is fine. Sorry for not letting you know about this incident.

 

 

Working on my resolutions #1

My sister has always complained that the fridge in my house is overloaded most of the time. She reminded me again a couple of days ago.

Today, a small voice told me that it’s about time I have a look at the fridge. Beckoned by the small voice inside my head, I ventured into the domain which I’ve neglected most in the past year. The kitchen seemed to look crowded as well. Empty containers at the kitchen table top left unwashed. Bowls and plates all dried up and waiting to be placed back into their respective rows in the cabinet. Half empty mugs in the sink, looking forlornly at me. Dusty bottles of condiments which I bet were probably expired by now. Sigh! The list goes on.

Half closing my eyes, I bravely reached for the handle of the fridge and yanked it open.

.

.

.

Amazingly, I could only catch a faint glow of the fridge light. It was so stuffed with things that no wonder I’ve been hearing the fridge making whirring noises and lately, the noise comes more frequently. Perhaps the fridge is hinting to me that it’s overweight.

 

I rummaged through the fridge and was appalled by all the stuffs I found inside. I just realized that we like to collect sweets and candies. After I counted, there were almost 30 pcs of all kinds of candies and sweets. I don’t even wanna think of how and where these came from.

 

Maybe we kept them initially to scam the kids who come to our house so that they stop bugging us? I dunno. We used to have kids from downstairs who always asked us whether they could come to our house to play. All the time. Why they liked my house? I have no faintest idea at all.

 

But their whole family had migrated to Belgium two years ago. Hmm…with the deduction in my mind, I think these sweets have been sitting in my forsaken fridge for about that long. Aiks!

. . .

 

Anyway, I continued dissecting the items I found. A box which contained small pieces of mooncake, leftover from eons ago. A bowl of sambal which now looked over-chilled. A bottle of expired Marmite. Four bottles of Mayonnaise, all half-empty. No idea why there were four. Probably been buying and forgetting that we still have some at home. There were all sorts of medicines and pill from various clinics, Dr. Ho, Dr. Lee, Klinik Medijaya etc. a bottle of pickled dill which obviously had expired long time ago in 2004. And guess what? I even found a bottle of tomato paste which had developed a huge spore colony and should be attacking the nearest enemy base (Er..excuse me, my imagination is running a bit wild today. Been playing Starcraft. Hehe!)

. . .

One thing which blew me over was when I reached the bottom of the fridge. When I opened the compartment, I was engulfed in a smoke of greenish dust. I choked over it a little and peered into the plastic bag. What I found was a couple of oranges. No, let me rephrase that. I saw a couple of powder coated oranges which seemed to have undergone a massive makeover. They no longer look orange-y. Instead, they have turned into a greenish powdery entity which dissolved into the air when held. YUCKS!!!

. . .

Alright, looking at the brighter side of things, it was not so bad after all, right? I didn’t encounter plump maggots or whatnots. So, I’m rather relieved about that. Phew! *wipes sweaty forehead*

So, after I dumped the expired foodstuffs and whatever I found inside, I ended up with three big bags of rubbish. It was a tough battle, cleaning the overloaded fridge and all.

It made me realized one thing though. We have been extremely wasteful. We kept buying stuffs which we only use once, say, the Mango Flavouring for jelly. And after used once, we chucked everything into the fridge and forgot about it till the next time we clean the fridge (which we hardly ever do).

I feel really bad for having such a bad habit. I realize that we have thrown out so many food over the years and yet, so many unfortunate children are going hungry everyday. We actually can make a small difference by changing our mindsets and cherishing the food given to us so easily. How can I teach my kids in the future and set a good example for them when I keep throwing away food? It’ll be like slapping my own face, ain’t it?

So, this year, I’m making it a clear conscious effort to buy necessarily when stocking up my grocery. Also, I’ll make more effort to check the items in my fridge more often. If there are fruits in the fridge, I’ll make more effort to cut and serve them so that they wont go rotten and turn into powder green. I’m not a chef at some restaurant, so I don’t really need all sorts of condiments if I’m only gonna cook once a while. Just make sure we have salt, sugar, pepper and soy sauce, enough for simple meals.

. . .

It has been an hour since I worked industriously in the kitchen and now, the fridge seemed happier. It’s no longer making whirring sounds.

Counting down

As we all usher into the new year, I took a minute or two to recap what I’ve done this year. And so far, I think I did pretty well. I managed to travel overseas twice this year and took three vacations. My classes with the kids went on smoothly with occasional hiccups. I managed to get a new laptop. I became an aunt again (Well, this part didn’t need much effort from my side, get my drift? Hehe…). I found a long lost friend and got reacquainted (sorta…). My relationship with the hubby got thru some tough times early this year but we persevered hard and were rewarded with a deeper level of understanding and communications were much closer.

Of course, there were certain sad times as well but I’m glad all is over now and I’m looking forward for a new year ahead with anticipation and hope.

So, I thought of some list of things that I wanna achieve in the forthcoming year. Well, I gave up high aspirations like stop world hunger and taking a bungee jump. Those things are way beyond my control and I hope to make little changes so that I learn to mature well into the 30s.

Anyways, here’re some of the things:

1. Have more discipline.

This is pretty simple. This year, I realized I’ve somewhat cultivated a habit of sleeping late and waking up late. I know, I get the luxury of not having to wake up in the wee hours and get stuck in the morning jam. But, that’s not really a reason to wake up when everyone else are already up and working. I felt more lethargic, actually. It ain’t healthy to sleep until the sun shines on my butt. My mom used to say that. “Wake up before the sun shines on your butt.” So, I aspire to have a regular sleeping pattern and wake up earlier to start an early day.

2 . Be a better aunt.

I love my niece and nephew but sometimes, I’m a tad too strict with them. Other times, I even have the nerve to ignore them a little. I’m ashamed to admit it but I did. Especially when I wanted to do my own things, say, hog the PC and play games on Facebook. I even snorted an answer to my niece that I was working. Yeah, I’m a terrible adult. Hehe…and it’s unbelievable that I work with kids, eh? *grins mischievously* Next year, my niece will be five and she’ll some learn that I’m actually playing Scrabble online and not ‘working’. Never underestimate a kid’s intelligence. This resolution is of 2nd priority.

3. Cook more at home.

I’m not proud to say that I seldom cook. The reason being that the hubby is always home late and as the years go by, we tend to have late dinners. Thus, the big expansion of the waistline. But, that doesn’t seem to be a valid reason not to enjoy home cooked food. I hope that our household will get more ‘homely’ and doesn’t end up looking like a bachelor pad. I hope to devise new recipes to entice the hubby and make him unable to resist the temptation of eating what I cook. Haha!

4. Last but not least, to lose the extra pounds and without a doubt, the pair of ‘wings’ I’ve developed this year.

Okay, I wish to shed the extra 10kgs 5kgs and I hope to fit in a pair of slim jeans without looking like a bloated goat! I’ve not even gave birth and I’m already on the ‘big’ side!!! Yikes!

Well, I don’t make it a secret that I’m getting fed up of looking at my pair of flabby arms and thinking to myself, “What happened to my previous body? The one with firm and toned muscles?” So, in order to relieve myself of this distress, I still aim to lose weight, even though this had been my resolution for as long as I can remember. The sad thing is that I’ve been getting ‘bigger’ as the years go by. It’s time to put a stop on that. It scares me just to think of how I’ll look like when I hit the 40s. Aiks!!!

So, you see, my resolutions are quite simple but unnecessarily achievable. That’s why this year, I’ve decided to document it down in my public blog. As a motivational force to remind me when I falter.

In about 3 hours time, we’ll be saying goodbye to the year 2007 and as Father Time brings in the whole new year, let me just wish everyone A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

G’nite y’all.